SkyDaz On Tottenham Hotspur

Last updated : 01 April 2005 By Darren Porter

Who would have thought that the SkyDaz ‘bobble’ curse would still work after all this time? Not since Richard Wright’s air shot that propelled us into the Worthington (Carling? Milk?) Cup Final has there been such a goalkeeping calamity. Wait a minute. Of course there has. There have been lots of them. A plethora. A whole shooting match. An abundance. Loads of top quality keeping catastrophes.

After the narcolepsy of Palace and the Baggies it was fantastic to see the ground full and buzzing with the anticipation, nay expectation, of a Blue victory. Since taking over at the theatre of hallucinations Steve Bruce has always adopted an attacking methodology although sometimes it has been shrouded into looking defensive by the inabilities of the working parts. Contrast this with his dour counterpart from the Victorian Shed in Lozells who arrived at St Andrews with the single thought of not conceding a goal. Leaving Darius and Carlton on the bench and playing the schoolboy Moore alone up front was the inspirational tactical genius of an Italian General.

There is no way those two were incapable of playing the ninety minutes. On entering the field of battle they ran around like decapitated fowls. Managers are fond of telling supporters that certain players cannot perform due to a slight injury, in essence they are either injured or they aren’t! It’s like being slightly pregnant! Tactically they were anal retentive and a first half lead from their only shot would have been unjust to say the least. The very Bod looking Mike Reilly tried so hard to help them out and rather than criticise him we should praise his care in the community efforts. Clearly he was trying to balance the equilibrium in the city by awarding dodgy free kicks and when they were just out of range moved them forwards until Solano told him it was perfect!

That loveable rogue Hendrie spent the first half showing the Villa fans how passionate he was by kicking everything in a blue shirt but somehow avoided being booked. After their fiftieth foul in the first half you would have thought one of the clueless orcs would have realised that all they were doing was giving us free kicks and an opportunity to pump the ball to the industrious Bully Brothers Heskey and Pandiani. Thus inviting pressure with no real outlet. The unbalanced booking count certainly did not bear any correlation to the foul count.

The fear that we may replicate the performances of Palace and Albion had disappeared within minutes of the match starting. It’s predictable that our players can motivate themselves for such an important fixture but it’s disappointing they didn’t play half as well in the previous two games.

Pandiani’s wonderful skill and through ball gave Heskey just the four defenders to beat, no problem, and we all know what happened next. I am aghast that the following day there were rumblings from Blues fans regarding the success of The Rifle. The critics must watch the game through their fingers, or their armchairs, or radio or teletext! Heskey and The Rifle pulled the Villa defence all over the pitch and terrorised them into panicking and releasing the ball early. Pandiani was excellent and his hold up play and distribution first class and only a rare, unexpected, save from Tommy prevented him notching. Give the guy a break, he is into his first few games in England, his right winger has gone to jail, he has had to play with Salif Diao, his truck is still in Deportivo and he only knows two words of English (answer on a postcard!). Those of you with a slightly better memory than some of the goldfish will recall a certain Mr Dugarry who also didn’t score many goals but the buzz he created around the ground was vital to our survival.

Do me a favour, in the next match you go to that The Rifle and Emile play in watch the runs they make into the box when the ball goes wide. One hits the near post and the other hits the far post and both find the all important space as only quality strikers can. The only thing lacking is the delivery, and the return of the Peter Pan Lazaridis and the tagged Pennant will surely result in decent balls for the predators to prey upon.

The pinball Villa defending for the second goal summed up their afternoon. The finish by Gray was surprisingly cool. For a guy I’ve lambasted for his inability to profit from his own skill in the area of the pitch where it really counts it was a sublime strike and fair play to the young man for staying so focussed.

Like the rest of you I have no idea what went on after the final whistle apart from to say that none of our lads had any reason to be spiteful and upset. Even though I’m a lover and not a fighter I still know that I would not pick on Emile Heskey or Mario Melchiot. I’m sure that whoever did got his just desserts.

It was an all round excellent performance and little Damien Johnson deservedly got some of the man of the match plaudits. Unfortunately this will never be accepted by some who absolutely slaughter the guy over every tiny miniscule mistake and then go quiet when he does something good. The loathing and bile spat in DJ’s direction is disturbing. I know he isn’t the best player in the world, that’s Ronaldinho, but he is a hard worker playing his heart out and deserves to be recognised as a wholly committed Blues player wearing a Blues shirt. I don’t like abuse being hurled at one of our own but can understand it as long as there is praise when he does something right. Come on lads (and lasses) have a heart otherwise we will sink to the levels of the Appalachian dwellers in Lozells.

After all we are still living with the tag that we drove out an international player not so long ago. I never thought our fans were like that, mainly because we have really seen some dross in our time. Our all time list of worst players would be some team. Ivor Linton? Richey Moran? Carl Richards?

‘We are Tottenham, super Tottenham, from the Lane…’ Now either you can break it to them or I can receive my usual quota of death threats! The shadow dwellers from North London are no super team, like us they have existed for a long time casting envious glances at the achievements of their neighbours. Unlike us though super Tottenham do not look like getting better than their close enemy. Spurs annually finish somewhere between sixth from top and sixth from bottom. The term ‘mid table mediocrity’ was invented for the Spurs and hopefully back to back victories will see us close in on the coveted top half finish.

Keep Right On but don’t park on the pavement.